Monday 16 April 2012

Fire? Fire!

I'm in the Blue box again. I need to work, the writing won't flow, but I know now that sometimes I need to wrestle the words out of my brain because they are shy these days.

The alarm begins.

"Is that the fire alarm?" S goes to the door, "No it's the door, it won't close." The students start filing out of the lab, it is the alarm. Not so familiar. It's only the second time I've heard the noise. The last time was a 2am wiring glitch. I have forgotten about it though, and now the noise is just the tickling feeling of a memory. I look questioningly at my laptop before I assure myself that this is just a drill. I grab my bag and cast a last glance toward my laptop as I join the slow, small exodus.

We're at the previously established gathering point, the admin staff are wearing red caps with 'Warden' blaring yellow from above the brow. I can only imagine that this would be of little comfort if the building was really going up in flames. I look up at the looming university building and my imagination superimposes great tongues or flame over its now calm exterior. The final scene of Hitchcock's Rebecca dances around my mind. The reality of this experience is somewhat anticlimactic; it is daytime now, sunny and far too glorious to lend any dramatic element to the situation.

I look about at the student body, there are so few people here. I'm sure most of the student cohort must be enjoying the final gasp of Summer weather at the beach or swanning about at some vineyard or engaged in some other equally leisurely activity.

My thoughts are muted, I should be working, but even if the alarm hadn't interupted me, I'm sure I'd be getting nothing done anyway. I'm losing the wrestling match today.

Another thought; I've been here for three years, and this is the first fire drill we've had in that time. Or maybe there were others and I was one of the beach-going cohort registering absence. Or maybe they just didn't happen, perhaps up until now the safety of the student body wasn't a concern. Everyone seems to be milling, discussing the assignments they are writing, or presentations to  be planned and practiced. Everyone is wrestling today.

It's over, we're back inside, everyone is settling down, preparing to continue the struggle. Brains don't like sunny weather. More students are arriving, I see B "You missed the fire drill!" her eyebrows shoot up "Really? I didn't know we had them." My thoughts exactly.

I'm going downstairs to the basement, N is on his phone discussing the virtues of the waves at Nanarup, the boys are downstairs, already halfway through a pool game, the kettle boils, more people on the couch reading. It is such a non-event.

I return to my laptop. I begin the wrestle again.

Tuesday 3 April 2012

Brooklyn 5am

I love songs that move your imagination to different places. This poem wound its way out of an image that travels through my imagination from time to time. I was listening to Bon Iver's 'Skinny Love' the other day, and it sort of just arrived at my finger tips.

Brooklyn 5am

The Brooklyn streets are cold this morning
But the worst of winter has passed now
I miss you I miss the sun I miss home
But this morning Brooklyn is beautiful
The trees are starting to slowly turn green now
They’ve been bare for months
Tiny green garments have started to gather on their branches
And the snow blankets have melted
They turn into thousands of tiny lakes plaguing the city paths.

I miss you, but today Brooklyn is beautiful
I would have stayed but I need the chill
My blood hates to be too warm
And the sun used to burn my skin
But I was made to be here
My blood is like silk in my veins and roses on my cheeks
Fingers have begun to thaw
We only wear our gloves in the morning and at night.
The days have started to gain color again

I saw a painting you would like the other day
It was black and white, just like you
I see you in the windows sometimes
I walk past some of them twice to catch you
I saw you behind a tree in the park as well
But when I got there you were a bum
Brooklyn is beautiful this morning
I still miss you some days. Like today
The city only reminds me of you in the things you would hate

Yesterday I smashed the crystal glass you gave me
It rained and I bled
I stood on the sidewalk under my apartment
And let the silk dirty the pavement
It isn’t clean here I like that
It’s wet and Brooklyn is beautiful this morning.
There’s a banjo playing in the coffee shop below
You would hate that
I go to the shop every morning for coffee, it’s terrible but I like it

I like the morning hours, before the sun and after it
I stand on the pale streets at four
I watch the city heave its breath, I watch the sweepers
Brooklyn is beautiful now, before the world wakes up
Shopkeepers receive boxes from trucks
The windows are lit and soon the people will come
Soon there will be faces in the windows and feet on paths
There will be hands waving for yellow cabs
It isn’t home, but Brooklyn is beautiful this morning




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